When suffering does not destroy you, even though you have been to the edge of the abyss, you know something that you cannot know in any other way. Someone else is sustaining you. You are indeed living by a life not your own. Or as I love to say, "Your life is not about you." It is henceforth, most truly, about God. And you are merely "free sample" of what God has always been doing. - Quote from Richard Rohr

November 23, 2006

Date Log: 11/23/06... Wow a month from my last update

Ok, what has happened this last month.

1. I was seeing some real clearing on my feet. But that has seem to gone away.
2. Good news: My lymph nodes have gone down or are gone completely.
3. Bad news? My blood work doesn't show much improvement. May know better this coming Monday (the 27th)
4. I've got pebbly skin. Yes, my thighs are thick and look like they have sugar pops, my rendition, or pebbles, Dr. D's rendition, stuck under my skin. This makes it difficult to sit and squat... which since I've moved my office this last week, I'll be squatting a lot to put all my books in place, etc. Dr. D suggested we wait 4 weeks to see how the "pebble" situation plays out. She thinks it's an reaction to being OFF the Targretin! Weird, huh?
5. I'm feeling a lot of stress. It's effecting my memory. Not sure if it's the meds, or just that there are circumstances that are playing into this affect. At least I don't feel depressed on this drug. Which is one reason why I will fight to stay on it,
6. I am seeing real skin, cleared skin on my arms.
7. My internal temperature seems to have gone whacko again. But then again it might be that it is the low 70's in Austin, cold for me, but not cold enough for "real" people to turn on the heat.
8. I do seem to be itching more, but then again it comes an goes. For instance today I woke up and my arms were itching very badly. I took my Gabapentin and Atarax and I'm beginning to calm down.
9. Because of the cold, no moisture in the air, I've been taking that combo. That may be adding to my spaciness.
10. I'm probably not putting lotion on enough times during the day. But it just feel awful. Cold, wet, and makes me itch until it dries.
11. My feet/ankles are very swollen this week, but I attribute that to the fact that I moved offices and was on my feet about 8 hours a day this week.
12. I still can not stand to be in clothes for more than 8 hours. 100% polyester (or silk when I can afford it) pjs are the only thing that feel comfortable.
13. I wore my nice pj bottoms to work on Monday and Tuesday (though Tuesday's pj weren't 100% polyester and I could tell at the end of the day.) That seemed to help a lot. I need to find other pjs that don't look so "pjish".
14. The cuts on my feet had almost cleared but today I have several cuts... wonder if its from being on my feet on all week with the moving? Makes sense.
15. The first week of November I slept HORRIBLY! Made my hours at work suffer. Or it might have been the 2nd week. But that has ended, thank you JESUS! Wonder if it might be related to menopause/period stuff? Need to keep an eye on that. And, sorry, I guess that is more information than you needed to know, right?

I'll let you all know what Dr. Duvic says on Monday.

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